It's 4 p.m. I have 30 minutes until I can start cooking dinner. Vivine is watching Finding Nemo (don't ask how many times this makes today), and I am trying desperately to stay awake. Today was my first day as a stay-at-home-mom. We didn't really stay at home, though. We went to Target this morning to get "a few things," which turned into a huge basketful of crap. I tend to spend a lot more money when Vivine goes shopping with me. I think it's because I'm moving so slow. I really think the key to being a good mother to a 4-year-old is to never be in a hurry. I can keep my patience, as long as I have nowhere else I need to be anytime soon.
One of the things we had to get at Target was a sponsor gift for our new sponsee-child at House of Hope. I let Vivine pick out a Polly Pocket doll for our sponsee, whom she knows well. It took about 20 minutes. Very important decision, I guess. Part of the problem was that they put all the expensive plastic junk at her eye level, with the affordable plastic junk...
Time out. This post was interrupted when Vivine came up to me and told me that she was peeing in her pants. Not that she HAD peed in her pants, nor that she WAS ABOUT to pee in her pants, but that she was peeing in her pants AT THAT VERY MOMENT. At least she is honest. I had to get her to stop peeing, change her clothes, go outside and play with her, cook dinner, eat, talk on the phone to mom, put Vivine to bed, eat more food (because I never eat enough during the actual dinner - too busy trying to keep her from spraying food everywhere) and, lo and behold, sit down and finish this blog post. It is 8:45 p.m. I'm freakin' exhausted and going to bed now. But it is a thankful tired.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Invitation
Affirmation of baptism for Vivine Langdon
8 a.m., Nov. 29, 2009
At our church
Everyone's invited to worship that morning and to stay for treats afterward. If you need more info, just e-mail me.
PS: In other exciting news, we got Vivine's social security card in the mail today. Now she can finally get a job!
8 a.m., Nov. 29, 2009
At our church
Everyone's invited to worship that morning and to stay for treats afterward. If you need more info, just e-mail me.
PS: In other exciting news, we got Vivine's social security card in the mail today. Now she can finally get a job!
Friday, November 20, 2009
A story and photos
Lots of people ask how Vivine's English is coming. The truth is, I don't really know. We speak mostly Creole at home with her, though PC and I speak plenty of English to each other and we watch TV in English. So far, ommunication hasn't been much of an issue for us. All three of us have figured out how to get our points across without much frustration.
Every now and then, though, we have some funny moments around language. Most of them happen when I am trying to explain something to Vivine that she has never experienced. Today at about 4 p.m., a UPS guy rang the doorbell and left a package on the porch for Vivine. (Thanks, Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Ted!) Vivine heard the doorbell but didn't see the UPS guy. She was really confused, seeing as how they don't really have The Mail in Haiti. Here's how our conversation went. (Translated into English for those who don't speak Creole.)
V: What was that "doo-dooo-dooo-doo?"
Me: That was the door. That's what a person does when they're at the door.
V: (Looking perplexed) Who is it?
Me: It was a man who brought you a gift.
V: Where is he?
Me: He left in his car.
V: Is he our friend?
Me: No, he brought a gift for you from our other friends.
V: What is his name?
Me: I don't know.
V: (Looks at me funny)
Me: He is working. He goes in his car to all the houses and gives gifts to the people.
V: Where is his car?
Me: Look! Your present! Want to see what you got?
V: Yes! (End of confusing conversation.)
I guess maybe you had to be there.
And now for all of you who have been so patient, here are some of the best photos from our first two weeks.
Family portrait taken by our friend Sarah
Playing Candy Land with Papi
My best day ever - vacuuming with my daughter! Thanks, Aunt Joyce, for the mini Dyson.
Granmarie bought this present two years ago! Vivine finally got to open it.
This Fancy Nancy skirt from Kiki went to Target, Shop-N-Save and the park!
Thank you, God, for beautiful weather our first week home!
Every now and then, though, we have some funny moments around language. Most of them happen when I am trying to explain something to Vivine that she has never experienced. Today at about 4 p.m., a UPS guy rang the doorbell and left a package on the porch for Vivine. (Thanks, Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Ted!) Vivine heard the doorbell but didn't see the UPS guy. She was really confused, seeing as how they don't really have The Mail in Haiti. Here's how our conversation went. (Translated into English for those who don't speak Creole.)
V: What was that "doo-dooo-dooo-doo?"
Me: That was the door. That's what a person does when they're at the door.
V: (Looking perplexed) Who is it?
Me: It was a man who brought you a gift.
V: Where is he?
Me: He left in his car.
V: Is he our friend?
Me: No, he brought a gift for you from our other friends.
V: What is his name?
Me: I don't know.
V: (Looks at me funny)
Me: He is working. He goes in his car to all the houses and gives gifts to the people.
V: Where is his car?
Me: Look! Your present! Want to see what you got?
V: Yes! (End of confusing conversation.)
I guess maybe you had to be there.
And now for all of you who have been so patient, here are some of the best photos from our first two weeks.
Family portrait taken by our friend Sarah
Playing Candy Land with Papi
My best day ever - vacuuming with my daughter! Thanks, Aunt Joyce, for the mini Dyson.
Granmarie bought this present two years ago! Vivine finally got to open it.
This Fancy Nancy skirt from Kiki went to Target, Shop-N-Save and the park!
Thank you, God, for beautiful weather our first week home!
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
A day in the life
In the past two weeks, we have established a nice little routine with Vivine. She knows what to expect and even talks at night about what we will do the next day. Unfortunately, the routine leaves very little time for communicating with the outside world. I would love to post more often and put up some pictures, but it took me three days to write just this one post. I'm about to fall asleep just editing it. Enjoy this - the next one could take even longer.
Here is what a typical day with Vivine is like:
6:30 a.m. -ish: Vivine (who sleeps with us) taps me on the shoulder and says, "pee-pee." I carry her to the bathroom and back. As soon as we lie down again, she says, "go shower." We wake up PC, who goes to draw the bath.
6:30 to 7:30 a.m.: Bathe, get dressed, eat breakfast. We typically eat cereal, which Vivine calls "Corn Flakes." (We don't even have Corn Flakes, but she calls all cereal that.) I try to drink as much coffee as I can.
7:30 a.m. - 9 a.m.: Mommy and Daddy tag team on showers. I try to clean up the house. Amidst the morning chaos, Vivine always ends up watching Finding Nemo, which she calls "Video Poisson." (Poisson is French for fish.) My goal is to be dressed and showered by 9 a.m. everyday. I'll have to move the goal up by two hours when I go back to work part-time, but I'll worry about that later.
9 a.m. - 10-ish: Mommy does Vivine's hair while she watches a video. I need lots of practice, so we have been doing hair almost everyday. I hope that by the time Vivine starts school my styles will have improved so they will last a couple of days. Doing hair is honestly my favorite time of day, though. If we have time, I let her do my hair, too, which consists of her putting approximately 80 barrettes all over my head.
The rest of the morning: Go somewhere, usually to a store. Mommy and Daddy have to leave the house at least once a day or we go crazy. Vivine does pretty well out in public, though she had a hissy fit in the bathroom at the community center the other day and we had to leave immediately.
Lunch: Eat together as a family, usually at home. We tried McDonalds the other day. Vivine ate two apple slices and drank a milk jug. Eating at home seems to work better.
1 - 3 p.m. Quiet time. We play a game in Vivine's room or, if we are feeling ambitious, try to get her to take a nap. Napping is a double-edged sword. It gives us a free hour during the day, but then she doesn't go to sleep until 9 p.m. Also, Vivine is absolutely awful when she wakes up from naps. Won't talk to us, look at us, eat, pee or do anything human. She just stands against a wall and stares angrily into space for at least a half-hour.
3 - 5 p.m. Play Candy Land, watch Wonder Pets (OMG the best show ever on Nick Jr. - look it up and watch it even if you don't have kids) and cook dinner. While I cook dinner, PC and Vivine wrestle and chase each other in the basement. Giggles and screams abound.
5 - 7 p.m. Eat dinner, clean up, play Candy Land again. Vivine has to get in about eight games of Candy Land for it to be a good day.
7 p.m. Start getting ready for bed. If Vivine didn't nap, it takes about 30 minutes. If she had a nap, it takes about an hour and a half.
7:30 or 9 p.m. PC and I high-five each other on a job well done for the day. Then we plop in front of the TV for an hour until we can't keep our eyes open anymore. I usually think about blogging but just don't have the energy to lift my fingers in rapid succession. It's a good tired.
Here is what a typical day with Vivine is like:
6:30 a.m. -ish: Vivine (who sleeps with us) taps me on the shoulder and says, "pee-pee." I carry her to the bathroom and back. As soon as we lie down again, she says, "go shower." We wake up PC, who goes to draw the bath.
6:30 to 7:30 a.m.: Bathe, get dressed, eat breakfast. We typically eat cereal, which Vivine calls "Corn Flakes." (We don't even have Corn Flakes, but she calls all cereal that.) I try to drink as much coffee as I can.
7:30 a.m. - 9 a.m.: Mommy and Daddy tag team on showers. I try to clean up the house. Amidst the morning chaos, Vivine always ends up watching Finding Nemo, which she calls "Video Poisson." (Poisson is French for fish.) My goal is to be dressed and showered by 9 a.m. everyday. I'll have to move the goal up by two hours when I go back to work part-time, but I'll worry about that later.
9 a.m. - 10-ish: Mommy does Vivine's hair while she watches a video. I need lots of practice, so we have been doing hair almost everyday. I hope that by the time Vivine starts school my styles will have improved so they will last a couple of days. Doing hair is honestly my favorite time of day, though. If we have time, I let her do my hair, too, which consists of her putting approximately 80 barrettes all over my head.
The rest of the morning: Go somewhere, usually to a store. Mommy and Daddy have to leave the house at least once a day or we go crazy. Vivine does pretty well out in public, though she had a hissy fit in the bathroom at the community center the other day and we had to leave immediately.
Lunch: Eat together as a family, usually at home. We tried McDonalds the other day. Vivine ate two apple slices and drank a milk jug. Eating at home seems to work better.
1 - 3 p.m. Quiet time. We play a game in Vivine's room or, if we are feeling ambitious, try to get her to take a nap. Napping is a double-edged sword. It gives us a free hour during the day, but then she doesn't go to sleep until 9 p.m. Also, Vivine is absolutely awful when she wakes up from naps. Won't talk to us, look at us, eat, pee or do anything human. She just stands against a wall and stares angrily into space for at least a half-hour.
3 - 5 p.m. Play Candy Land, watch Wonder Pets (OMG the best show ever on Nick Jr. - look it up and watch it even if you don't have kids) and cook dinner. While I cook dinner, PC and Vivine wrestle and chase each other in the basement. Giggles and screams abound.
5 - 7 p.m. Eat dinner, clean up, play Candy Land again. Vivine has to get in about eight games of Candy Land for it to be a good day.
7 p.m. Start getting ready for bed. If Vivine didn't nap, it takes about 30 minutes. If she had a nap, it takes about an hour and a half.
7:30 or 9 p.m. PC and I high-five each other on a job well done for the day. Then we plop in front of the TV for an hour until we can't keep our eyes open anymore. I usually think about blogging but just don't have the energy to lift my fingers in rapid succession. It's a good tired.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
On coming to America
"Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
Vivine's immigration to America began at the U.S. Embassy in Haiti. On Friday, Nov. 6, we received Vivine's Haitian passport with her immigrant visa printed inside. We also received an 8.5 x 11" manila envelope and were told to give it to the immigration officer in Miami. The embassy lady told us very clearly NOT to open the envelope.
I can't count how many times on our trip to Miami I asked PC, "Do you have the envelope? Where is it? Is it still sealed?" When we got to Miami, we had to walk about four miles to the immigration windows. (For more about the Miami airport, read my previous post.) This time, we stood in the "Visitors" line, which moves about a million times slower than the "Citizens and Residents" line where we usually go. It took 45 minutes to get to the front. Vivine waited patiently the whole time with the help of some M&Ms. The agent at the counter looked over her passport but did NOT open the envelope. He put it in a green folder and gave it to a lady who escorted us to a special room, which I will call The Hole.
The Hole had four rows of those connecting bus station chairs crammed into a space where two rows would have fit comfortably. My knees nearly touched those of the person sitting in the row opposite me. The only thing that made it bearable was that most of the 80 of us in there spoke different languages, so you felt like you got some privacy. Along a long wall of The Hole was a very tall counter with three agents all bitching about how short staffed they were and how so-and-so was taking a break for too long. They clearly had lost sight of the fact that their 75 patrons were experiencing one of the most significant moments of their lives. Here we were, all sitting there with our sealed manila envelopes, all about to go from living in one country to living in another, and all smirking at each other about the pettiness of these grouchy agents.
We waited in The Hole for about an hour and a half. Vivine had to go pee-pee about thirty minutes in, and I had to ask permission to take her. On the way back from the restroom, I realized I had left both of our passports in The Hole. I momentarily freaked - would I be let back in? I had no proof whatsoever that I was an American, that this little girl of a different race was my daughter, or that we had permission to be ANYWHERE. Fortunately, the gatekeeper of The Hole remembered us. It pays to have a cute 4-year-old who skips everywhere in a very memorable way.
Finally, an agent called Vivine's name, gave us back her passport, and sent us on our way. I was expecting something more ceremonial, at least like saying the Pledge of Allegiance or something. We didn't get so much as a "Welcome to America" brochure. AND they kept the envelope. To this day I have no idea what was in it. I should have asked one of my co-inmates in The Hole.
Unceremonious though the immigration process was, I have never felt happier to be an American. I mean, this is what we're here for, you know? Not only are we a country of fresh starts, but so few of us can claim an inheritance of the land by birth. We were all adopted by our country. I love that my family reflects the diversity and the history of our country. I can't think of a place I'd rather raise Vivine. *Cue snare drums and trumpet regalia - I know I'm being sappy, y'all - comes with the whole Mom thing.*
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
Vivine's immigration to America began at the U.S. Embassy in Haiti. On Friday, Nov. 6, we received Vivine's Haitian passport with her immigrant visa printed inside. We also received an 8.5 x 11" manila envelope and were told to give it to the immigration officer in Miami. The embassy lady told us very clearly NOT to open the envelope.
I can't count how many times on our trip to Miami I asked PC, "Do you have the envelope? Where is it? Is it still sealed?" When we got to Miami, we had to walk about four miles to the immigration windows. (For more about the Miami airport, read my previous post.) This time, we stood in the "Visitors" line, which moves about a million times slower than the "Citizens and Residents" line where we usually go. It took 45 minutes to get to the front. Vivine waited patiently the whole time with the help of some M&Ms. The agent at the counter looked over her passport but did NOT open the envelope. He put it in a green folder and gave it to a lady who escorted us to a special room, which I will call The Hole.
The Hole had four rows of those connecting bus station chairs crammed into a space where two rows would have fit comfortably. My knees nearly touched those of the person sitting in the row opposite me. The only thing that made it bearable was that most of the 80 of us in there spoke different languages, so you felt like you got some privacy. Along a long wall of The Hole was a very tall counter with three agents all bitching about how short staffed they were and how so-and-so was taking a break for too long. They clearly had lost sight of the fact that their 75 patrons were experiencing one of the most significant moments of their lives. Here we were, all sitting there with our sealed manila envelopes, all about to go from living in one country to living in another, and all smirking at each other about the pettiness of these grouchy agents.
We waited in The Hole for about an hour and a half. Vivine had to go pee-pee about thirty minutes in, and I had to ask permission to take her. On the way back from the restroom, I realized I had left both of our passports in The Hole. I momentarily freaked - would I be let back in? I had no proof whatsoever that I was an American, that this little girl of a different race was my daughter, or that we had permission to be ANYWHERE. Fortunately, the gatekeeper of The Hole remembered us. It pays to have a cute 4-year-old who skips everywhere in a very memorable way.
Finally, an agent called Vivine's name, gave us back her passport, and sent us on our way. I was expecting something more ceremonial, at least like saying the Pledge of Allegiance or something. We didn't get so much as a "Welcome to America" brochure. AND they kept the envelope. To this day I have no idea what was in it. I should have asked one of my co-inmates in The Hole.
Unceremonious though the immigration process was, I have never felt happier to be an American. I mean, this is what we're here for, you know? Not only are we a country of fresh starts, but so few of us can claim an inheritance of the land by birth. We were all adopted by our country. I love that my family reflects the diversity and the history of our country. I can't think of a place I'd rather raise Vivine. *Cue snare drums and trumpet regalia - I know I'm being sappy, y'all - comes with the whole Mom thing.*
Sunday, November 8, 2009
We are a family
On the way to U.S. Embassy in Haiti to apply for visa.
I know I need to post something to the blog, and I have a lot to say, but I just don't know where to start. We are home - all THREE of us. Vivine is napping in her bed. She has been asleep for almost two hours. Is that normal for a 4 year old? Should I wake her up? Is she even still breathing? Will she cry when she wakes up and I'm not in the room? Maybe I should just go in there and wait for her to awaken. Thoughts like those have been flooding my brain ever since we crossed through the security checkpoint in the Haitian airport and were on. our. own.
The trip to House of Hope was the best we have ever had. (Maybe because all we did was hang out with Vivine and the girls and not do any work. I'm not going to feel guilty for that.) We had a little scare on Friday when we went to pick up her visa. The printer was broken, and wouldn't be fixed until Monday, two days after our scheduled departure. I asked if we could wait another hour to see whether the printer could be fixed now. Lo and behold, we had the visa 20 minutes later. That's Haiti for you.
Vivine seemed to really enjoy the trip home. She slept through most of the two plane rides. In the airports, we kept her occupied with coloring books, fruit snacks, and a Magna Doodle, which, in my opinion, is the most wonderful invention in the history of the world. Seriously, I now hold the Magna Doodle in higher esteem than the Internet, cell phone or printing press.
Being Vivine's mom feels very natural to me, like this is what I was meant to do my whole life. I can't imagine another framework for parenting. What do people who don't adopt children from Haiti do? All I want in life is for her to be happy. She might never be as happy to be our daughter as we are to have her for our own, but I'm going to work really hard to try to get close.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Leaving on a jet plane
Our bags are packed, and we're ready to go! Say a prayer for safe travels and a smooth visa appointment on Thursday. Watch the blog for updates after we return on Saturday.
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