Miscellaneous

Topic One: Vah-Vah-Velour

This weekend I got out the Rubbermaid tub of winter clothes and started the Biannual Closet Switch-Out. (I could write a whole 'nother blog entry about how much I love putting things in Rubbermaid tubs. One of my goals is to leave all of my possessions in five Rubbermaid tubs just before I die. One tub will be Coach purses. One will be keepsakes and newspaper clips. The other three will probably be yarn.)

I tend to forget what clothes I have from season to season, so unpacking seasonal stuff feels like getting new clothes. Tonight I was delighted to rediscover my old faithful friend, the velour jumpsuit. I actually have two velour jumpsuits, one in each of my signature colors: brown and gray. How do I describe my relationship with the velour jumpsuit? Guilty pleasure? Unrepented sin? Let's face it, the velour jumpsuit just barely passes as Decent. It's 80 percent Hoochie Mama, 5 percent Camel Toe and 15 percent I-Just-Don't-Give-A-Damn. When I wear it out in public, I feel a like I did in seventh grade when I wore a midriff to Casual Day at church. I know I'm "pushing it," as my dad would say. This year, I'll try to limit my velour jumpsuit-wearing to at-home hours only. But if you see me at Walgreens buying ice cream and razor blades in a velour jumpsuit, don't judge me.

Topic Two: The Power of Negative Thinking

I went to the chiropractor yesterday for the first time in months. (I only go if it hurts real bad.) He told me to drink less alcohol and coffee, but mainly less coffee. I told him I could do it the other way around, but I could not decrease my coffee intake. Then he asked me if I had "problems producing a positive creative image." Huh? "When you visualize the future, do you only envision negative things happening?" he asked. Wow! I thought. Can you fix that by cracking my back? Because it sure would be nice not to spend the entire day visualizing my daughter growing older by the second while I'm missing the opportunity to be her mommy, which will probably make it that much harder for her as she tries to adjust to her new life in America. Instead, I said, "Maybe," and he said, "Well, it's just what the book says to ask." This morning I had my usual amount of coffee, and the usual amount of fearful thoughts about the adoption. But, hey, my back felt a lot better.

Topic Three: The perfect Chai

"Chai" is Russian for Tea. I drank eight cups of tea a day when I studied abroad in Russia. My favorite brand was called "Ahmad." It was an English tea imported to Russia. It tasted strong, brisk and bold and was sooooo comforting. I brought a little bit home with me, but, golly, that was eight years ago and I drank it up pretty quick. I had almost forgotten about it until today when I saw it the hospital gift shop, of all places. I was so enraptured that I strolled right into the back office and personally thanked the gift shop manager for ordering it. Tonight I had a cup. Lord, have mercy, it took me right back to the Motherland. The box even has Russian wording on the back describing the flavor and ingredients.

So this is how emotionally parched I am right now - I feel like finding this tea in the hospital gift shop was a SIGN. It was a little love note from Heaven saying, "See! I haven't forgotten you. I know you think your life is crazy and disjointed and makes no sense, but it's all going to come together." I mean, dang, if my favorite English tea from Russian can find its way to a little hospital gift shop in St. Louis where I happen to be working eight years later, then I can find my way in this world, too. Right?